Unapologetic ManSmut
by Sailor Seraphim
Summary: When Duo returns to the safe house after a particularly bad mission, it's Heero's job to make him feel better. Poor Heero... he should have done more research. 1x2x1 Yaoi.


Title: Unapologetic Man-Smut  
Author: Sailor Seraphim (slrsera @ aol.com)  
Archive:   
l.e.t.h.a.l.t.h.o.u.g.h.t.s. :: http://www.pluh.com/members/icefire  
FanFiction.net :: http://fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=39868  
Final Triumph :: http://www.geocities.com/finaltriumph  
Emy's Archive :: http://emy.gwyaoi.com  
All others please ask.  
Rating: PG-ish?   
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or any of its related characters. If I did, the series would be chock-full of tasty shounen ai goodness. I do, however, own the situations that occur in this fic.  
Pairings: 1x2x1... sorta.  
Warnings: OOC... shounen ai/yaoi... hurt-comfort... lame humor. SEX! IMPLIED! Did that get your attention? Oh... and no scarecrows were harmed in the making of this fic.  
Spoilers: absolutely *nothing* except for general series knowledge  
Notes: Hope you like your giftfic, Mikke-chan! I can't believe that I actually wrote something like this. I guess it's therapy or penance or something. I also stole the title from her, since she couldn't find a way to use it. You know... this was *supposed* to be an angsty, tortured H-C. I tried. I really did. The bunnies had other ideas though.  
Feedback: I take all constructive criticism. No flames, they leave nasty scorch marks on the carpet.  
  
  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
  
  
The mission hadn't gone according to plan.  
  
That was the only coherent thought that could make itself known in the weary mind that belonged to Duo Maxwell. Shivering as he dragged his battered and aching body through the night towards the safe house, all Duo could think was that the mission hadn't gone according to plan. It was his fault. It was all his fault. If he had been stronger, faster, smarter... if he'd just been *more*, then Duo wouldn't have gotten caught by OZ. He could still see them coming for him... could still remember how it felt to fall against the relentless pounding... Duo tried very hard not to go to pieces. Finally, he could see the safe house. Duo wrapped his arms around his bruised (hopefully not broken) ribs and collapsed against the front door, his body impacting against the cold, unforgiving wood and jarring his injuries even more. Duo moaned in pain, then bit his lip to stifle the noise. Curling up right here on the doorstep was starting to sound like a very good idea. As the braided boy began his slow descent into unconsciousness, he was vaguely aware of the safe house door being thrown open, and a familiar figure silhouetted by the warm, welcoming light within.  
  
"... Heero..." Duo murmured, just as he felt warm and strong arms wrap around him.  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
It was the feel of gentle fingertips skimming his face that finally drew Duo out of unconsciousness. His violet eyes blinked slowly, his vision finally stabilizing into the worried face of Heero Yuy. The American pilot managed to smile a little, just for him.  
  
"Hey."  
  
Heero's eyes brightened and he leaned closer, pitching his voice so low that Duo had to strain to hear. "Hey."  
  
"What...?" Duo managed to ask, trying to sit up. But Heero put a restraining hand against his shoulder.  
  
"Don't move. You were injured."  
  
"Tell me something I don't know, Yuy."  
  
"How did it happen?"  
  
Duo froze, violet eyes widening. Then he carefully turned onto his side, his back towards Heero. "I don't wanna talk about it," he muttered into the pillow. Duo didn't notice the strange look that appeared in Heero's eyes. Eyes closed, the American was still aware of his lover shifting position. The mattress dipped down under Heero's added weight, and soon Duo could feel hands carefully undoing his braid and stroking softly through the long chestnut strands. Duo smiled a little, and then frowned when Heero moved again, this time bracing himself partially over Duo's prone body. The feel of Heero looming over his made Duo nervous and he scrunched his eyes shut, fighting against the feel of the bruises on his body; lying on his side was making his shoulder and ribs feel like hell. Heero's hands returned, but were rubbing soothing circles across Duo's back. The American smiled again, tension seeping away slowly, and drifted off into a light sleep.  
  
He was abruptly woken by the fact that Heero had just ripped his black over shirt off his shoulders. With a yelp, Duo snatched his shirt out of Heero's hands, violet eyes glaring. Heero was unperturbed, and tried to take off Duo's pants. Duo swatted his hand away and struggled to push himself up into a sitting position despite the screaming of his ribs.  
  
"Heero! What the fuck are you doing?!"  
  
Heero looked up from where he was trying to unfasten Duo's pants, hampered by Duo's squirming. "Well, I would be if you would just hold still and let me get you naked."  
  
"WHAT?!" Duo yanked away, tumbling out of the bed and holding what was left of his shirt to his chest and his pants up. "This isn't funny, Heero! Don't you come near me again!"  
  
Heero's brow furrowed for a moment before a look of clarity appeared. "Oh... it's one of *those*." Moving slowly closer, Heero held out on hand as if he was taming a wild animal. "Duo, I love you. I don't care what happened to you now, or what happened to you in the past. Let me show you how much I care."  
  
Duo backed away until he hit the opposite wall. "Look... Heero... I don't know what's up with you, but this is starting to get a bit freaky. Cut it out!"  
  
Heero lowered his hand and frowned again, Prussian blue eyes narrowing. "I really wish you would make up your mind," the Japanese boy stated. "You know, I really don't enjoy doing this, but I suppose if that's the way you want it..."   
  
With that, Heero pounced, slamming Duo against the wall hard enough for the American pilot to momentarily see stars. Before Duo could respond, Heero was looming rather menacingly over him, hands fisted in what was left of his shirt.   
  
"You're mine," Heero snarled, his face inches from Duo's. "No one's allowed to touch you but me!"  
  
Duo's mouth dropped open in shock, and that was a Very Bad Idea because Heero pressed a kiss against his lips, once so forceful and demanding that the no-longer-braided boy knew his lips would be bruised. As Heero started to paw at him, yanking down his pants, Duo freaked out and slammed his knee up -- unerringly -- against Heero's crotch. His lover gave a weird sort of squeaking sound that Duo normally would have laughed at, if he wasn't so scared shitless. He quickly bolted for the other end of the room while Heero trembled in a little ball on the floor.  
  
"WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH YOU, YUY?!" Duo screamed, his loose hair settling across his now bare back and shoulders.   
  
Heero looked up, his intense blue eyes now slightly watery because of the pain coming from his groin. "I... take it... you didn't... enjoy that?"  
  
Violet eyes widened in shock. "Jeezus! Has the whole world gone insane? What makes you think I would want that?!"   
  
The Japanese pilot slowly uncurled from the floor -- yay for enhanced healing! -- but remained sitting, looking up at Duo. "Oh, wait... do you want to top? I guess that would make sense. Fine."   
  
Something short-circuited in Duo's head.  
  
With a sort of eerie calm, Heero started to strip off his tank top. He was reaching for his shorts before Duo's brain engaged again, and he started waving his arms wildly. "No no no! Don't take off your clothes!"  
  
Heero rolled his eyes and removed his hands from the waistband of his spandex. "You want to do it with our clothes on? Or are we talking about dry-humping? Should I put my shirt back on but take my shorts off? That's sort of kinky for this kind of situation, but I don't mind. Do you want to use handcuffs? They're in the drawer."  
  
"HEERO! *What* are you talking about? You're not making any sense to me!"  
  
The other boy blinked and stared blankly at him. "Don't you want to have sex?"  
  
Something *else* short-circuited in Duo's head, but what it was is unknown because there was precious little rattling around in Duo's skull by this point. "And just *why* would I want to have sex? Urr... besides the obvious reason that I'm a hormone-laden 15-year old boy?"  
  
"Didn't you just get brutally violated by OZ soldiers, triggering a flashback to your torment-filled past were you were abused in every way possible, and some not possible but still manageable if you're extremely flexible?"  
  
It was Duo's turn to blink and stare blankly. Heero's features immediately took on the cast that meant "concerned" and stood up, moving towards Duo. "Oh, are you having another flashback? Are you going to burst into tears and scream and rail at the world for being unnecessarily cruel? You should probably lie down then... it'll make it easier for me to exploit your vulnerability, yet still manage to make you feel at peace with yourself because of my tender and loving caresses."  
  
"Heero... I don't want to have sex."  
  
"You're just in denial. I already told you that I don't care if--"  
  
"Heero? Are you pulling this shit out of some handbook I don't know about?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You actually think that I want to have sex because I was traumatized?"  
  
"No--"  
  
"Good."  
  
"You *need* to have sex to get past all the barriers you've built around your heart."  
  
"Okay... now I *know* you're reading that out of some freaky book. Or a very warped greeting card."  
  
Heero actually sighed and looked over at the clock on the wall. "Look, Duo," he said, a sharp note of impatience in his voice. "This has been going on too long. I should have had you on your back and begging to come ten minutes ago. Maybe if this was a multipart, we could indulge in your psychotic fantasies. But this is a oneshot. So get over here, start crying, and let me get you naked!"  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
Somewhere in the distance, a fourth wall shattered into pieces. Some of the shrapnel managed to ding some random people walking by. Their wounds weren't very deep, just scratches and shallow cuts. Except for one guy who lost an eye. But he was a big jerk and mean to everyone and liked to torture small animals. Everyone said it was because he didn't have a stable father figure, but that was a big fib. He *deserved* to lose that eye. He became a much nicer person because of it and found God.  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
Violet eyes flashing crazily, Duo balled his hands into fists. How could Heero yell at him for not following a *schedule*?! Did getting over a major trauma even *have* a schedule? "What the fuck are you on, Yuy? Is this some kind of mission to you? Step One: Make Duo cry. Step Two: Fuck him into the mattress?"  
  
Heero rolled his eyes. "I'm just trying to be a sensitive boyfriend, alright?"  
  
"BY TAKING ADVANTAGE OF ME WHEN I'M IN PAIN?!"  
  
"Ha!" Heero exclaimed, pointing at Duo. "You just admitted it!"  
  
Duo's mouth dropped open and he did his impression of a landed fish. Then he shook his head. "I admit nothing! I was just making a point!"  
  
"What more do you want from me, Duo? I'm just doing what I'm supposed to!"  
  
"Says who?!"  
  
The Japanese pilot looked insulted, drawing his shoulders back and standing in his full height (but he looked really silly because he was only 5'1" and dressed only in a pair of spandex shorts). "I've done the research necessary to deal with this sort of situation."  
  
"You mean you were *waiting* for me to get brutalized by OZ soldiers?" Duo screeched. Running away screaming was starting to look like a good idea at this point.  
  
"Yes... I mean, NO! I didn't *want* it to happen. I just wanted to be ready for any situation that could come up in our relationship."  
  
"What the hell kind of research deals with this?"  
  
Heero looked away, a faint flush on his cheeks. "Well, it's not scientific research per se... they're called fanfics. Specifically, hurt-comfort fics. I ran across them while I was trying to hack into OZ's mainframe. But this happens all the time and I'm just doing what they all say I should."  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
Somewhere, the shattered pieces of the fallen fourth wall exploded. The explosion also wiped out a field of carrots. But it was okay because the carrots had already been harvested, so nothing was really lost. Except for the scarecrow. But it was a really crappy scarecrow in the first place and didn't really keep crows or anything else out of the field, so no one was really crying over it being gone.  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
Duo stifled his urge to beat his head repeatedly against the wall. At this point, Heero would probably think that he was trying to hurt himself in response to his trauma. He decided to take use a different method. "Heero... I'm only gonna say this once, and you're damn well gonna listen to me."  
  
The Japanese boy was relieved. Things were falling back into one of the many scenarios he had seen for this sort of occasion. "Of course. I'll be as supportive as you need me to be."  
  
Duo snarled and resisted ripping his hair out by the roots. "Heero! I wasn't fucked by OZ!"  
  
Heero wasn't fazed. Okay, a different scenario then. "Was it a gang?"  
  
"NO! No one touched me! No one!"  
  
Heero stared blankly (this was happening a lot). This wasn't in his plans. Wait... maybe he was missing something. He could still get some if he played his cards right. "Then how did you get hurt?"  
  
Duo snorted and shoved his long chestnut hair over his shoulder. "In Deathscythe. My restraints snapped during the firefight and I got tossed around the cockpit like a ping pong ball."  
  
"So... no one violated you?"  
  
"No," Duo answered, somewhat disturbed by the way Heero sounded so disappointed.  
  
"No one brought up your horribly tortured and traumatic past?"  
  
"No," Duo said. He was getting even more disturbed. Heero was giving him that kicked puppy look that made him weak in the knees.  
  
"So you got hurt because you're a fuck up who forgot to strap in right?"  
  
"Yeah-- hey! I am *NOT* a fuck up!"  
  
Heero glared at Duo before throwing his hands in the air and stalking over to his laptop, muttering something about "crazy baka Americans" and "shoddy Magunac workmanship." Duo stuck out his tongue at Heero's turned back. Then he moved back to the bed slowly, because his ribs hurt like a sonovabitch and spending a half hour yelling at his boyfriend really didn't help things. As Duo made himself comfortable, the only sound in the room was the rapid sound of typing coming from Heero's laptop. But just as he was settled, the typing sounds stopped. The American looked up, having to shove his long hair out of his face. Heero twisted in his seat, fixing Duo with an unreadable look.  
  
"So..." Heero said, Prussian eyes piercing Duo from beneath his dark bangs, "can we still have sex now?"  
  
Duo looked at Heero -- who was shirtless and sitting at the desk -- and looked down at himself -- he was shirtless and his pants were half on -- and shrugged. "Sure, why not? It's not like we have anything better to do."  
  
Heero pounced..  
  
A pair of black pants sailed through the air as the bedsprings squeaked.  
  
After a lot of tonsil hockey and gratituitous groping, Duo pulled away from Heero, gasping for breath. "I... just want you to know... that I'm not... uuuhhhhhh... having sex with you because... oh! Right there! Because... I'm traumatized... YES!!!"  
  
Heero raised his head from between Duo's legs and nodded. "That's fine. I've seen this situation in my research as well."  
  
"Oh? OH! Ooooohhh...!"  
  
Heero smirked, yanking off his spandex and throwing it off to the side. "Yes... they're called PWPs."  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
Somewhere, the burnt and unrecognizable remains of what used to be the shattered fourth wall stirred. A wind blew up out of nowhere and a thick fog descended. When the fog lifted, the remains of the fourth wall were gone, and a small bunny was in their place.  
  
The bunny's nose twitched.   
  
And its eyes glowed red.  
  
  
  
  
  
-- Owari -- 


End file.
